By Holly LeMaster

We teach William Bridges’ Transition Model in our signature programs to illuminate the process that human beings go through as they experience change. A change—the thing that happens—is a clear and obvious event that occurs when something old stops and something new begins.

Read more ...

By Barb Ward from an interview with Kathleen Mineo, PHR

In today’s fast-paced world, you are expected to do more with less and always have a dozen things on your list that you must do to be an effective parent, leader, coworker, partner, teammate, and friend. You have phone calls to answer, emails to reply to, bills to pay, meetings to attend, and so on.  To be more productive, you must be able to do more than one thing at a time—you must be an expert at multitasking. Right? The answer is no. In reality, your brain is not wired to work that way. Neuroscience has proven that the human brain can only focus on one high-level function at a time.

People who think they are multitasking are actually just switching between multiple tasks at a very fast rate. It has been proven that doing so is not effective; in fact, trying to multitask makes it less likely that any of the activities attempted will be completed successfully.

For instance, have you ever tried reading a book and carrying on a conversation at the same time? Or tried writing an email and talking on the phone at the same time? These tasks all require the same part of the brain (language and word processing), and the brain cannot handle both requests simultaneously. When you multitask, you effectively reduce the amount of attention you are giving to each task to 50% or less.

What’s more, according to Stanford News¹, a study by Stanford researchers compared groups of people based on their belief about whether multitasking would improve their performance or not. They found that the group who believed multitasking would boost their performance were worse at successfully completing multiple tasks in the same time frame as those who preferred to do a single task at a time. The multitasking group had more difficulty logically organizing their thoughts and filtering out irrelevant information. They were also less adept at switching from one task to another.

Multitasking can also:

• Impact short-term memory, which can make it difficult to manage tasks and focus on key information.
• Lead to increased anxiety. Multitasking increases production of the stress hormone cortisol, as well as the flight-or fight hormone, adrenaline. These hormones can make you feel out of control, anxious and sick.
• Inhibit creative thinking.
• Cause more mistakes and lower productivity.

Maybe you’re still thinking, “Okay, but I am an exception, I am a woman and women naturally multitask better than men.” Or, “Yes, but I am young, my brain functions at a higher capacity.” Think again. Multitasking does not discriminate. Both women and men are equally bad at multitasking. And, even though younger people who have been raised on multiple devices and notifications are more likely to be multitaskers, these same youngsters are more likely to take longer to do their work and have a harder time remembering what they’ve learned.

The good news is that, by changing your behavior patterns, you can eliminate the detriments of multitasking and increase your productivity. The first thing you must do is take back control of your time.

Here are some things you can try:

• Create a daily schedule and stick to it.
• Block out sections of your day to complete specific tasks. Don’t let distractions interrupt that time.
• Schedule specific blocks of time for reading and answering emails and phone calls. Be true to your time limits.
• Turn off alerts on your phone and email when you are trying to focus.
• Take brain breaks. Taking breaks allows you to relax and refocus your mind.
• Clear clutter and distractions, both physical and digital, from your work space.

Using mindfulness techniques can also help refocus your mind and keep it focused. Pick one of the following to do throughout the week and see if it helps you relax, feel calmer and be more productive.

Mindful breathing minute

Breathe deeply and relax for one minute. You may keep your eyes open or close them, whichever relaxes you. Focus your attention on your breathing and relaxing your body. Clear your mind of all thoughts. This can be a powerful tool to calm you when start feeling stressed or overwhelmed.

Be in the moment

Studies show that 47% of the time we are thinking of things other than the task we are completing in that moment. This means that, often, when we are having a conversation with another person, we are focusing on our own inner thoughts instead of what they are saying. Next time you are having a conversation, put conscious effort into giving your full, undivided attention to the person to whom you are speaking.

Mindful appreciation

Notice five things in your day that usually go unnoticed and appreciate them. Whether you choose objects, people, or even events, the point is to make you aware of all the things you have to be thankful for, from the seemingly insignificant to things that mean a great deal. For example, you may not give much thought to the electricity that keeps your home warm or cool, or makes your coffee in the morning, your clothes that provide warmth and comfort, or the person who delivers your mail. Taking time to identify these things helps you be grateful for the ways they support you in your life.

While these tips and techniques may not completely cure you of multitasking, they are small steps that can help you retrain the way you work and live your life. Over time, you will see the positive impact these changes have on the way you approach your life, and your work. 

1 Media multitaskers pay mental price, Stanford study shows, Stanford Report, August 24, 2009

 

By David Quigley, MSW

In traditional Navajo woven rugs there will be a deliberate imperfection that looks like a mistake. The weaver might incorporate a line of a different color thread from the outer edge of the pattern into the edge of the rug. This imperfection is so that the spirit of the weaver does not get trapped in the center of the rug in the tight and perfect pattern. I am wondering if there might be an aspect of this perspective that can help us “from getting trapped in the spirit” of perfection, production, achieving, accomplishing?

We often encounter high-performing leaders with track record of high achievement and successful accomplishment. We often hear that we should strive to give 110% to a project. When does drive become over-drive? How often does our perfectionistic capacity get over-exercised? And how might we counteract this, or at least give it an occasional and well-needed rest?

I once observed a highly trained, well-respected, and very accomplished clinician who had a habit of practicing slight eccentricities. He would also take an intentional ‘one down position’ in a conversation. Almost like he was taking a bit of a Detective Columbo approach to his work.

These habits, or should I say practices, made him more approachable, less intimidating, more down to earth. They were endearing, too, and they were intentional. This was his way of not taking himself too seriously and increasing his effectiveness in communicating with others.

I thought of him as I contemplated the Navajo weavers and their intentional imperfection. How can we use this idea as a soothing balm to the stresses of achieving, producing, and accomplishing and, therefore, help to regain that delicate work-life balance?

Here are a few ideas to help you incorporate imperfections in your work:

Resolve to make a mistake once a week
I knew a clinical supervisor once that would assign the highest performing students in her charge to make one mistake a week. Of course, this was not to be a mistake that would negatively affect patient care or outcomes; rather, simpler little mistakes that were, nonetheless, painful for the perfectionistic elements of ourselves. For instance, things like:

• an intentional misspelling in an email
• mispronouncing a word
• putting a stamp on an envelope crookedly (I dare you to try it)

Be deliberately imperfect

• A nurse leader I knew would wear socks or shoes of two different colors
• A CEO that would always leave a button undone on his button-down shirt as a reminder for him to not be too much of a “stuffed shirt” or “buttoned-downed” type of guy

Add a bit of lightness of heart to your work
My first hospice patient was a collector of silly puns and jokes. His motto was: my illness might be critical, but it doesn’t have to be serious.

In our work we often, all too often actually, encounter high-performing leaders who are showing signs of burnout and or compassion fatigue. They are under tremendous pressure. Over time, that can have significant negative effects on our well-being and performance.

A mentor once told me he felt that, as we age, we should develop our eccentricities. So, in the spirit of doing serious work but not falling prey to perfectionism, I encourage you—no, I triple dog dare you—to practice intentional imperfections as a way to take your work seriously but keep your heart light.

 

By Laurie Cure and Barb Ward

On our blog a few weeks ago, we talked about how hiring the right candidate is the first step in a successful employer/employee relationship. This article is the follow-up we promised on employee engagement and retention.

So, once you’ve got the right candidate, how do you keep them?

It’s a commonly known fact, and research supports, that people do not leave organizations—they leave leaders. And, while you may think that keeping employees engaged is just a feel-good tactic, engaged employees have proven to be willing to go the extra mile for their employer, be more productive, and be absent less. This is important because every person in your organization is affected by employee engagement, either positively or negatively, and employee engagement directly impacts your bottom line.

According to a Gallup survey, disengaged employees have 37% higher absenteeism, 18% lower productivity, and 15% lower profitability. If you convert these percentages to dollars, you can estimate a loss of 34% of that employee’s salary. And that is only one member of your staff. Now, imagine if this one disengaged employee is negatively impacting those around him/her: you could potentially end up with a team of non-engaged employees, costing your organization in both productivity and profitability.

What’s more, according to a 2017 survey, Gallup reports:

• Only 33 percent of American workers are engaged at work, meaning they love their jobs and try to make their company better every day
• At the other end, 16 percent of employees are actively disengaged—they are miserable in the workplace and destroy what the most engaged employees build.
• And further, the remaining 51 percent of employees are not engaged—they’re just there.

These figures illustrate that a shift in leadership is necessary to increase employee engagement that will ultimately increase an organization’s productivity and bottom line.

So, first, how do you determine whether your employees are engaged?

Typically, engaged employees will go above and beyond because they feel a strong emotional connection to the organization, or to their leader. For the engaged employee, success is a personal achievement. Typically, these employees:

• Are self-motivated
• Understand how their contribution to the organization matters
• Have ownership in their contribution to the team
• Feel a connection to their team and to the larger organization

Additionally, in an organization that has high employee engagement, you will find that the employees have developed trust amongst their team members, have well-defined roles and expectations, have opportunities for professional and personal development, and enjoy the people around them.

Second, how can you increase employee engagement in your organization?

Organizations that are aware and invested in building strong employee engagement have several traits in common. They offer:

• Meaningful work. Employees are willing to work harder and tough it out through difficult transitions if they feel there is meaning to their work and if they feel their effort is making an impact.
• Autonomy. Once the parameters of the job are set and onboarding is complete, allowing individuals to determine the best way to approach their job based on their personality and skill sets is important. Giving employees autonomy in how to complete their job requirements demonstrates your confidence in them and empowers them to work independently.
• Flexibility. Providing an option of flexing hours to fit their life schedules or enabling employees to work offsite without compromising quality or productivity offers greater work-life balance, which many workers now seek in their employment options.
• Opportunity for growth. While salary and benefits are important for job seekers, many also want an opportunity to grow in their careers. Staying challenged, having the ability to grow their skills, and seeing opportunities for career advancement are all integral aspects of keeping employees excited about their jobs and the organization.
• A voice. Engaged employees are enthusiastic and passionate about their jobs and their organizations; they feel they can contribute. As part of a two-way commitment to their staff, leaders can benefit, both through potential improved communication and processes and through increased employee engagement, by listening to the valuable insights their employees can offer.  
• Authenticity. A leader is someone people want to follow. Leaders must demonstrate that they care, have empathy, are trustworthy, are loyal to their employees, and exhibit integrity. What’s more: these characteristics must be authentic. If a leader is not consistent in the way s/he handles situations, employees will see through it and will easily become disillusioned.
• Employee recognition. Recognizing an employee’s contribution helps to build pride in their work and loyalty to the organization. No matter what level, people want to feel their contribution is respected and valued by their superiors and the organization.

Changing the culture of an entire organization is a daunting task; however, if leadership is committed to making this shift, it can be done. Engaging help from a company that specializes in Organizational and Culture Development can be integral to ensure a successful outcome.

Interested in learning more? Reach out to learn about executive coaching, leadership development, employee engagement and more.

 

By Holly LeMaster

Let go of what was

Surrender to what is

Have faith in what will be.

~Ricotti

What painful stories are you telling yourself? Are you feeling stuck or powerless? Are you living in regret, guilt, or blame? Sometimes we hold onto past mistakes and negative situations, playing them over and over in our heads, justifying all the reasons we are terrible people, why others are terrible, or both.

On some level, our problems may give us a sense of identity or justify our behaviors—a secondary payoff. We may hold on to pain and allow ourselves to suffer. And there might be hidden benefits in this strategy:

• We don’t have to process our own feelings or acknowledge our true pain
• We are absolved of accountability (none of this is actually my fault, right?)—we get to keep thinking we are right and blame others
• We don’t have to summon our courage to face the unknown
• We get to play the role of the victim, to let others dote on us and make us feel important

This kind of morbid rumination is almost never helpful or productive—it is unhealthy in every way, causing stress and potentially creating serious health issues. And then we normalize the stress, the sleeplessness, our ill moods, the secondary illnesses, convincing ourselves that “it’s just the way it is.” Life stinks. We’ve been dealt a bad hand. Too often, we turn to our favorite addictions—whether chemical substances, food, gambling, shopping, getting lost online, in our screens—to numb ourselves and forget for awhile.

In these ways, our attachments and fears limit us and prevent us from living a fulfilled, happy existence. Our denial and avoidance skills may allow us to feel better in the moment, but are not effective long-term coping strategies.

Letting go is about acceptance and acknowledging the reality of the situation, facing the facts. Letting go is not about giving up; rather, it is about being willing to think differently, to release the ways we are causing our own suffering. We can’t change other people and we can’t change certain situations. Ultimately, the only thing we can change is ourselves and the way we think about, react to, and integrate circumstances. We must honestly assess: what is actually in our power to control, and what is not? And how are we going to cope with those things that are truly outside our sphere of influence?

The Serenity Prayer embodies this beautifully:

Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

The courage to change the things I can,

And the wisdom to know the difference.

So we take responsibility and accept accountability for what we can, and give ourselves permission to grieve and let go of the things we can’t.  When we let go of things that are weighing us down and holding us back, we create space for better things to enter our lives.

Depending upon the circumstances, forgiveness can be a crucial part of this process—forgiving others and forgiving ourselves. Forgiveness is not about pretending that another person did not do something wrong or bad—they very well may have done. Rather, forgiveness is letting go of your attachment to the anger, blame, and self-righteousness, and victimhood that can go along with holding a grudge. Forgiveness, ultimately, is for you—not for the other person.

Honoring Everyday Grief

We usually think about grief as it relates to the loss of a loved one. However, grief can arrive as a result of many different transitions and life events—both big and small, sudden and gradual. We shouldn’t discount the impact that normal, everyday losses can have, especially if we “stuff” them down and do not acknowledge and honor the feelings as they arise. For example:

• Your child goes off to college (or even kindergarten)
• A beloved friend pulls away emotionally
• Your brother and his family move across the country
• You or your partner lose a job
• A health challenge increases instead of improving
• A pet is lost
• A cherished family heirloom is broken
• Your home is robbed

And what about this one? You lose a patient in the E.R. or on the floor. Those in healthcare experience far more frequent and intense daily loss than most of the population at large. And these emotional incidents can accumulate in the heart when there is no appropriate outlet for expression.

“Time heals all wounds,” the old adage goes, and that can be true if you are conscious and intentional. However, if you are practicing avoidance and denial, the pain never truly goes away—it is just more deeply buried in the heart, the mind, and the psyche.

Intentional grieving and letting go can be healing and transformative. Some practices to help you do this might include:

• Allowing yourself to experience your feelings in the moment (yes—cry!)
• Talking about/processing emotions with a good friend, loved one, or therapist
• Honestly acknowledging and accepting the reality of circumstances, including how much they hurt
• Journaling
• Practicing forgiveness, of both yourself and the other person
• Asking for help and support
• Turning to your faith and spiritual practice

I want to acknowledge that many people face serious issues of abuse, illness, or trauma that can take years of hard work, deep courage, and good therapy to heal; my intention is, in no way, to diminish such incredibly difficult circumstances.  

However, when it comes to our own happiness, personal growth, and emotional experience, we can take personal accountability. We can allow ourselves to honor and feel our normal human painful emotions, then let go and move forward stronger, wiser, and more resilient than before.

let it go
e.e. cummings

let it go – the
smashed word broken
open vow or
the oath cracked length
wise – let it go it
was sworn to
go

let them go – the
truthful liars and
the false fair friends
and the boths and
neithers – you must let them go they
were born
to go

let all go – the
big small middling
tall bigger really
the biggest and all
things – let all go
dear

so comes love

 

By Beth Stiner, in partnership with Barb Ward

In martial arts, color-coded belts signify a ranking system that represents class advancement and recognition for the hard work and discipline a student dedicates to master the art. The belt also serves as an external symbol, alerting the other students in the martial arts community to what the student is working toward, inviting others of higher rank to step in with support and guidance. Wouldn’t it be nice if we had the same indicators in leadership? The ability to claim our areas of learning and mastery. The invitation to form a community to encourage one another’s growth.

While a system such as this does not exist, it’s important to realize, whether you’re a first-time manager or a seasoned executive, that leadership is a continuous journey. There is always room for growth and learning, no matter how masterful you are.

So, what makes a black belt leader, and where are you on the journey toward mastery?

White and yellow belts signify that a student is a beginner.

• White belts symbolize innocence, a clean slate, and new beginnings.
• Yellow belts represent a seedling being adorned by the transformative rays of sunshine and opening the mind to wisdom.

You have worked hard and received a new leadership position. Whether this is your first leadership position or you are an experienced leader taking on a new role, you may be starting out as a white belt with regard to your experience in this role, with this team, at this organization. At this stage, it’s essential to give yourself permission to be a learner. This means being curious, absorbing the environment around you, listening with an open mind, and allowing yourself to not have all the answers. Everyone has been new at some point, and if you act like you have all the answers when you don’t, you miss the opportunity to forge new relationships with those around you who could support your learning. When you ask co-workers for their help and advice, it shows them you respect their knowledge. This can help you develop strong relationships from the beginning. Take your time at this level and enjoy the newness of it all. Allow others to step in and support your learning.

Orange, green and blue belts are for those immersed in the study and application of their art.

• Orange belts symbolize growth both physically and mentally.
• Green belts signify the sprout of a seed emerging from the earth. With a firm foundation, they strengthen and refine their techniques.
• Blue belts are a symbol of the sky, illustrating that the student is preparing for a transition to be an advanced student.

As you have grown into your position over time, you likely feel more competent and knowledgeable in your role. Your energy is focused on deepening your competence in the role as well as leading others. Now is a great time in your journey to ensure that feedback channels are open with superiors, coworkers, and direct reports so you are aware of potential derailers that may be keeping you from being as effective as you’d like.

Using a tool called a 360-degree assessment, leaders rate themselves and ask people they trust and whose opinions they value to rate them on the same criteria. This combined self- and peer assessment can be an invaluable asset by identifying both areas where you are excelling and areas in which you could improve.

The 360 may point to opportunities for your leadership to go from good to great; it might also reveal feedback that is unexpected or difficult to accept. In these situations, it can be helpful to employ the services of a leadership coach. A coach can work with you to define your leadership goals and use the feedback received to propel you forward in your development. Increasing your self-awareness and proactively identifying development goals can be the difference between soaring to new possibilities or stalling in your trajectory within the company.

Brown and red belts signify high competency through hard work and maturity.

• Brown belts represent ripening and maturing as students gain the skills necessary to advance to the highest levels through hard work and determination.
• Red belts are a symbol of the power of the red-hot sun. Red belts know their strength and ability, and now must practice caution and control as skill level and abilities become more developed.

Leaders who have advanced to this level are mastering themselves, their work, their teams, and their relationships. They understand that success is not all about what they can accomplish individually, but rather mobilizing the hearts and minds of others to achieve results. They honor their responsibility as a role model for others, knowing that even the simplest things (such as their ability to be present in their interactions, responsive to their colleagues, and on time for meetings) sets the tone and expectations for everyone around them.

As a brown or red belt, a fundamental necessity is knowing your own level of emotional intelligence. Research by Daniel Goleman found a strong correlation between effective leadership and emotional intelligence. Emotionally-intelligent leaders have high self-awareness, an ability to manage their own emotions and behaviors, awareness of the dynamics of the teams and organizations they operate in, and strong relationship management skills.

Do you tend to find yourself triggered by certain people or situations? Do you find yourself talking more than listening? How well do you navigate conflict and

give feedback? An emotional intelligence assessment can help you identify the areas of emotional intelligence where you are strong and detect areas of opportunity before they become limitations or derailers. If you have not previously taken an emotional intelligence assessment, you might consider doing so. We consider this important baseline information for our Innovative Connections coaching clients and participants in our Signature Programs.

The great thing about emotional intelligence is that it can be learned. Just as a red belt gets stronger and faster with every training session, we as leaders can do the same—improving how we lead ourselves and others.

The black belt, the ultimate achievement, symbolizes the “darkness beyond the sun” and mastery of skills and achievement.

• Black belts use their knowledge to teach others, and at the same time continue to broaden their own understanding, continually seeking knowledge. Within the black belt level, a separate ranking system breaks down mastery into degrees, or levels of achievement.

A black belt signifies a level mastery; however, it is not the end of the journey. Those familiar with martial arts know black belts are often referred to by “degrees.” For example, a “third degree black belt” is even more advanced than a “first degree.” There are guidelines for this progression through the degrees of the belt, including skill mastery over a specific period of time, teaching and development of others, and the person’s contributions to the community through service and new knowledge development.

Similarly, in leadership, a black belt leader isn’t simply someone with a CEO title. It is not a leader who rests on past accomplishments as the sole proof of future success. It is not a leader who leads through ego, arrogance, power, or fear. Rather, black belt leaders are the ones at work humbly serving their communities, mentoring and engaging others, continually evolving, stretching and reaching new levels of accomplishment, finding fulfillment in the “being” of leadership as much as the “doing.”

Leadership is a lifelong journey. The metaphor of the martial arts belt system is a creative way to reflect on our leadership journeys and the communities of people we serve. Martial arts students at every belt level demonstrate commitment, focus, and hours of practicing their skills to progress through the ranks. Experienced executives as well as first-time leaders must do the same to develop and improve.

Ready to explore your own leadership mastery? Reach out to start the conversation about executive coaching, 360 assessments, emotional intelligence, and more.